If you’re going through a divorce, you’re likely thinking of how your children feel about the process, how they will react to the news of a divorce, and what can be done to make divorce easier for children. At Amber M Serwat Mediation, we want to not only help you achieve a quick and successful divorce, we want to make sure that your divorce affects your children as little as possible. That said, how can we know what children are thinking, how they’re feeling, and what their concerns may be about divorce? If your child cannot open up, if you’re concerned about what your child may be feeling, and if you want to understand divorce from a child’s perspective, our Burnsville, MN divorce mediators want to help so that you can have the least stressful, healthiest divorce possible for your entire family. To take a closer look at how divorce affects children, look to a Huffington Post article titled “7 Ways Divorce Affects Kids, According to the Kids Themselves:”
1. Acting Out in School but Increasing Responsibility at Home
Often times, children can feel frustrated with their situation, acting out at school as a means of letting go of pent-up anger and aggression. This can result in bullying and behavioral problems at school that you may not be aware of. That said, a divorce can also cause a child to take on more responsibility at home, either by choice or by necessity. You may find that your older children become role models for the younger, and your children may be feeling the need to take care of you, in some capacity, during and following a divorce.
2. Feeling a Sense of Relief
You may be surprised to find that your children are as relieved as you are that your relationship with your spouse is finished. This can be true for adults and young children alike, especially if you and your spouse were prone to verbal fighting or other volatile actions.
3. Feeling the Financial Strain of Living with One Parent’s Income
Many children notice when their financial situation changes, and no matter how hard you try to make sure everything feels “normal,” it won’t be. Talk to your child about the financial changes in your life so that they understand how and why things are changing.
4. Blaming Others for Their Actions
Children who are frustrated with a divorce will seek to blame others for their misdeeds, but much of their behavior can be attributed to their unhappiness with a situation at home.
5. Struggling to Accept Divorce, Even in Adulthood
Children may find it challenging to move on after a divorce, feeling complex emotions about your relationship with your spouse, their relationship with both parents, and loving relationships, in general.
6. Feeling Angered When Parents Talk Badly About Each Other
Children love both parents, no matter what happens in a divorce, and hearing one talk badly about the other can lead to greater frustration and confusion.
7. Feeling Happy When Parents Thrive After a Divorce
No matter what happens before or during your divorce, your children will be happy to see you doing well following a divorce because they love you. They want you to move forward as much as you want to.
For more information about how divorce can impact children, contact Amber M Serwat Mediation in Burnsville, Minnesota at 952-252-1492 or amber@amsmediationplus.com.
