Co-parenting after your divorce is final can be challenging. After all, you likely had very good reasons for deciding to divorce your partner, so you may wish that you did not have to continue regular contact and communication. However, co-parenting is a new phase of your relationship, and it is extremely important – especially for your children – to find ways to communicate in a positive and healthy way. AMS Mediation works with families in Minnesota to find ways to communicate in a respectful and productive way. Our team can help you avoid common co-parenting communication pitfalls like:
1. Talking negatively to your kids about your former spouse: Even though you may still feel anger and resentment towards your former spouse, try to keep your kids from hearing negative comments about your ex. Keeping your communication to your kids positive can help them feel less stress.
2. Responding with emotion: Try to approach communication with your ex without emotion. If you can try to communicate professionally, instead, about the logistics of custody and schedules rather than about your anger and frustration.
3. Not communicating enough: Once your divorce is final, it may be easy to decide to minimize all communication with your ex. However, if you share children, keeping the lines of communication open are critically important. You will need to talk about schedules, appointments and other issues that come up. Try to be respectful and schedule a time weekly when your kids cannot overhear to discuss these issues. If you need help, a trained mediator can help you navigate communication issues more easily.
4. Putting your kids in the middle: Your children love both you and your ex and may feel caught in the middle as they share time between your two homes. Try to avoid communicating to your ex through your kids, and handle issues directly.
5. Being closed off to feedback: Resist the temptation to assume that you are always right when it comes to a disagreement or dispute. Try to remain open to feedback and remember that it is not important who is right or wrong necessarily, but more important to put your kids first.
Improve Communication After Your Divorce in MN
AMS Mediation offers post-divorce mediation services that can help you and your former spouse navigate your unique issues without escalating the conflict. We also offer communication coaching which can help you develop strategies for positive and productive communication. For more information or to schedule a time for a free one-hour consultation, call us at 952.252.1492.
